25 July, 2012

Hot Flash

I knew no Spanish when I moved my life to Colombia, save for the limited counting vocabulary supplied to me by 1980's Sesame Street programming, pleasantries, and basic "life words" like baño and cerveza.  Now that is all my brain wants to fall back on.

Fortunately, Brazilians understand the gist of spoken Spanish.  Unfortunately, it only gets me so far and the conversation quickly becomes one-sided.

Cambuí neighborhood Starbucks
After two classes of basic Portuguese - grunting an moaning made up a good portion of the first one - I felt I needed to put myself out there and not permit my Spanish to be a crutch.  I went to the Starbucks in my neighborhood to order a coffee and muffin.  (There is a bakery closer to my apartment but it was too crowded and the threat of an audience was too much pressure.)

As I stood awkwardly alone in front of the pastry case, the barista asked if she could help me.  Nope, just looking for some Portuguese sounds in here, thanks!  As I pretended to scan the scone options with unnecessary intensity, I thought about how, right now, Portuguese seems to have a thousand more vowels in play at any given moment than Spanish does; many words sound the same to the ear, but to get them out the mouth requires the tongue to juggle a few more O's and company.

Smile.  Why am I sweating?

"Eu queria um café com leite por favor."*  Breathe.  At least the "por favor" came out right.

Wow, it is hot. in. here!

Oh, wait!  The muffin!  
No time.  
Forget it. 
You don't need it.  
Stop while you're ahead.

Aaaand...congratulations, you're sweating more.

So many of the words in Portuguese are so close to the Spanish that my habit-formed brain and mouth aren't accustomed to adding, changing, or eliminating a sound.  I want to say "es" when I need to say "é" but the "s" keeps finding its way back into the word.  Slithering, probably; I feel like S's do that.

I have 80 hours of one-on-one Portuguese language instruction coming at me in the next few months.  At the very least I will hopefully be able to not break into an anxious perspiring mess from a simple coffee order.

* I can not express how slowly this came out.  It was painful.  Possibly more painful than reading this post.  I hope my future traumatic experiences are more entertaining than this one.

21 July, 2012

Hostage Situation

"He's at lunch," said the woman holding my shipment of possessions from Colombia, "I'm sure he'll be done soon."

Rewind.

After landing in São Paulo, successfully navigating customs and retrieving all parcels of luggage, a member of the school welcoming committee took me over to the cargo and shipping building in an attempt to at least locate and confirm that somewhere within the facilities country was the other half of my belongings. 

The last memory I had of them was watching as a slatted pick-up truck drove away, swerving to avoid the plethora of potholes multiplying on my quiet street in barrio Limonar.

A visit to the "holding office;" a stop at the Copa Airlines office (after having temporary security photo-ID badges made up at the information kiosk); photocopies of my passport, visa, plane tickets from Minnesota all the way to São Paulo, and the itinerary that at one point in time I flew from Cali to Minnesota, and a few signatures later, we ended back at the "holding office" to be encouraged to "go have a coffee" and come back while they sort out the paperwork.

While the rest of the new import staff and my luggage headed off to Campinas, my director and I stayed to finish the job of freeing my boxes from their forklift-guarded incarceration.  Once the paperwork was filed - and our coffee break over - we then had to pay a small ransom processing fee at the bank.  

It should be noted that there were several banks on location.  At the shipping building.  Which is well-separated from the airport and near nothing else.  That may not be fair; the loading dock workers probably appreciate all the financial counseling opportunities afforded them right on the job site!  

After making bail the payment, the "holding office" said it would be another 30 minutes to an hour to locate the boxes and then pass customs.  While I was thrilled they had made good use of their time during the hour we were running around signing, copying, and depositing things, not to mention the week it had been sitting in the warehouse after arriving from a foreign country, I was just happy to be almost reunited.  

I was so close!

Enter the previously quoted woman.  She is the "gate-keeper," if you will.  Seated delicately at her wheely-chair with a look of more authority than anyone behind a press board desk should ever have, this lady and her gun-metal grey scanner determine which packages can be legally liberated from the warehouse.  After pulling the car to the loading dock exit, my director and I watched, impressed, as the forklift drivers whipped around the vast shiny concrete floor, easily maneuvering around stacks of boxes, people with a death-wish on foot, and each other much like dragonflies over a pond of newly hatched mosquitoes.

The trance brought on by the dance of the fork-lift drivers was broken when the woman notified us that the driver was coming with the boxes momentarily.  Sure enough, they emerged from around the corned!  My director left to open the car as the driver stopped and unceremoniously put my plastic bins on the ground behind the gate keeper's desk and drove away.  

So. Close.

Turns out the code that someone we met sometime during the previous gincana was supposed to enter, wasn't.  And now he is lunching.  And because this is Latin America still and no one else can do anyone else's job, we must wait. 

As all lunch breaks eventually do, this one too, ended.  My things were freed and we began the drive to my new home where I would eventually unpack and consider, whilst unpacking and remembering certain items, whether it was worth the wait.  And weight.  

18 July, 2012

Brazil: The Prequel

In Colombia people often say "es complicado" when things are difficult or challenging.  Acquiring my Colombian work visa in the summer of 2007 felt like a dizzying process.  Lots of apostilled documents and a trip to Chicago to visit the consulate - with an inconvenient stroll to the bank across Michigan Avenue - seemed like a lot of work.

Colombia: take note.  You don't know "complicado."

I began the process of receiving my Brazilian work visa back in early February when I sent off a letter of employment from my then-current employer in Cali to the Brazilian consulate in Bogotá - the consular seat for that geographic jurisdiction - to be "legalized."  A short time later I sent off a university transcript to Chicago - by way of a friend who then handed it off to a future colleague - for the same treatment at the consulate in the windy city.  

Congratulations, Chicago, you win!  Legalized transcripts were successfully sent off to Brazil with no issues.

Over the next month, my unfortunate letter of employment was translated into three languages twice, stamped, sealed, signed, and notarized by the minister of education for Colombia in Bogotá (on two separate occasions) and the secretary of education for Cali (once).  Three months later the good folks at the Bogotá consulate were satisfied enough to give it the all clear and away it too was sent to Brazil to finally meet up with its long lost brother documents.

Now, it seems that Brazil is very thorough (or slow) in processing these types of things so "45 to 50 days plus five business days" later, I was notified that my visa application was ready in Chicago.  Application.  As in, "not finished yet."  Side note, I leave for Brazil in three days.  Further side note: I need to come in person and the consulate needs to keep my passport for the duration of the time it takes to put a sticker on a page.  Consulate website states four days to two weeks.  (gasp!)  
Enter Tuesday - the hottest, meltingest day in the history of Chicago - where I fly in and out from Minneapolis in one day in hopes that the Brazilians on Michigan Avenue take pity of my situation caused by the glacial pace their compatriots in Bogotá moved back in February, March, April and some of May.

Now, let's skip to the anticipated ending: Tomorrow, Thursday, I am getting on a plane in Minneapolis to land at O'Hare, with all my luggage for life in Campinas.  I am doing this without a passport, something that may prove to be a detriment upon arrival at the check-in counter.  In Chicago I will leave the airport and head downtown to be at the limited visa office hours of the Brazilian consulate between 12 and 1pm where some nice and efficient lady will return my passport, complete with work visa, to me and I will cruise back to the airport to catch a late-afternoon flight to Dallas.  In Dallas I will have approximately 50 minutes to meet up with some future new colleagues at the departure gate and we will all merrily make our way into the southern hemisphere waking up to the São Paulo sunrise.  (exhale...)

Colombia turned out to be amazing and I thought that was hoop jumping.  
If this goes well, Brazil might just be epic.

Oh, don't ask me about luggage logistics.  I'm on a mission.  

Es complicado.